Some awesome one liners to keep you in splits

Caught the following ones on the net a long while back but forgot where i got them from.

- Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under
- The one who invented the door knocker got a No-bell prize

- The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large
- In democracy its your vote that counts. In feudalism its your count that votes.

- When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye
- Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

- It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers
- An office with many people and few electrical outlets could be in for a power struggle

- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
- There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils

Vote for whichever you thought was the best or if you can add some of your own, go ahead!!